My God is faithful.

   To start off, for those of you who don't know, life hasn't been all joy and smiles this year. This year has been hard for a lot of people, me included. There have been trials, sickness, heartache, hurt, worries, and more. Friendships have been ruined. People have been betrayed and lied to. A lot of bad things have happened this year.
   But.. This year has not been all bad. There have been good things. Hope, friendships, faith, love, growth, and more. People have gotten a lot closer to people. Some friendships have been built that, outside of the circumstances that they were built in, probably never would have happened. God has shown Himself to so many people throughout the bad things. I am going to share with you a few good things that have happened because of bad things.

   Something happened, that I am not going to go into, that caused a friendship I had to end. I thought I had a very good friendship with this person, but it ended in an ugly way. It happened over three weeks ago, but the pain is still here. Even so, God has comforted me throughout it. He has shown me that He let this happen for a reason, even though it hurts. It's brought me closer to God and taught me to trust Him more. Also, because of this, I have become closer to a couple of my friends. They have been there for me and helped me get through it. Even through bad circumstances and hurt, God is faithful.

   For a little bit over a year, I've been having unexplainable health problems. They got a lot worse around summertime. Every time I eat, I am in pain. Sometimes the pain is not bad, sometimes the pain is excruciating. We haven't found any food triggers, which means no certain food makes the pain worse or not as bad. We've done tests, I've been scoped, they've run blood work, I've been put on so many different prescriptions, and none of it has helped or brought results. The tests have shown that there is nothing seriously wrong with me, but we still don't know what is causing the pain. Because of the pain, I can't eat as much or as often as I used to. I like food, so this hasn't been fun for me. But even so, God has taught me to trust Him through it. When we were waiting for the test results to get back a little over a month ago, I was stressed out about it. I surrendered it to God. And God is faithful. He gave me such a peace about it. Even though I could have had very serious problems, God reassured me that it was going to be okay, no matter what the test results showed. And praise be to God, the tests results showed that nothing was seriously wrong. He showed me that He is here with me carrying me through it. We are still searching and trying to figure out what is wrong with me, but through all the pain, tests, and prescriptions, God is faithful.

   Along with the pain, I have also been having trouble sleeping. The doctors don't know if this is related to the pain with eating. It could be, it could not be. I can't sleep at night a lot of times, and even when I can, I am often fatigued throughout the day. For a while, I took maximum strength melatonin, which would usually knock a person out, and I still couldn't sleep. Most people would think of this as horrible and annoying.. And honestly, for a while, it was. But.. God is faithful. One night when I couldn't sleep, I started praying. I started praying at night more often, and I can honestly say that even though the fatigue gets old, I am blessed to have the extra time to spend with God. Through all of the sleepless nights, God is faithful.

   Last night was another one of those sleepless nights. I usually have music playing in my iHome, but my sister is home right now and she can't sleep with music on. However, I can't sleep without music. So I put my headphones in and decided to sleep like that. I usually listen to Switchfoot, NeedToBreathe, Relient K, or something else along those lines at night. For some reason, last night, I changed my iPod from Switchfoot to a playlist called 'Worship music'. I was laying in bed, and to no surprise, I couldn't sleep. Thoughts were flooding my head, particularly about the friendship that I had lost. I was feeling hurt and lonely, but God is faithful. Last night was one of those nights where sleeplessness was a blessing. I was lying there listening to the worship music, and unexplainable peace flowed over me. It was wonderful. I began to worship silently (my sister was asleep). God comforted me. I felt so less lonely. I was lying there and it was like God wrapped His arms around me and took away the hurt and loneliness. I felt so free. And it was such a unique opportunity to worship my Saviour. Through the feeling of loneliness, God is faithful.

   I just started an Ebenezer list. You're probably asking, "What's an Ebenezer list..?" Well, I actually got the idea at New Camp in 2010. Erik Bledsoe led worship, and we sang Come Thou Fount quite a bit throughout the week. There's a line in the song that says, "Here I raise my Ebenezer, hither by Thy help I've come." and up until that week, I didn't really understand what it meant. Erik explained it before we sang the song one day. It goes back to the story in 1 Samuel 7, where Samuel set up an Ebenezer to thank God for His help in the battle against the Philistines. Ebenezer literally means 'Stone of help'. So basically, my Ebenezer list is a list of how God has helped me. How God has brought me this far. It consists of things as little as God providing money for something, or as big as God doing something that changed my life. It's a small list right now, considering I just started it, but it shows God's faithfulness. I already know that it was a good idea that I started the list. It will be something I can look back on in a few years, or when life is hard, and remember God's faithfulness and how He has brought me to where I am. Throughout life, God is faithful.

   I hope that this blog shows something to whoever reads it. I hope it reminds everyone who reads this about God's faithfulness. About how wonderful, loving, and caring He is, through the good things and the bad things. I hope that you never forget that God is faithful and loves you. I hope that you remember the Ebenezer's in your life, that it is by God's help that you have come to the place you are. I hope you remember that throughout hurt and heartache, God is faithful. That throughout medical issues, tests, and countless prescriptions, God is faithful. That throughout sleepless nights, God is faithful. That throughout feelings of loneliness, God is faithful. That throughout life, God is faithful. Throughout everything, GOD IS FAITHFUL.


"The LORD's lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. 'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul, 'Therefore I have hope in Him.'" -Lamentations 3:22-24

                                                   Ebenezer.

Write love. Anywhere, everywhere.

   Anyone who knows me and has been around me for even a short period of time knows that I'm a big fan of To Write Love on Her Arms (TWLOHA). For those of you who don't know, TWLOHA is "a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery."
   Jamie Tworkowski started TWLOHA in 2006 to help a friend, Renee Yohe, get the treatment she needed. He and his friends prayed for her and did everything they could to help her. They are friends with Switchfoot, and even made them some t-shirts to wear during their concerts. What did those shirts say? To Write Love on Her Arms. That's how it got started. Jamie and his friends began making shirts and selling them to pay for Renee's treatment. Now, because of Jamie deciding to make a difference, over 150,000 people in 40 different countries have gotten help through TWLOHA since it started.

   A lot of times, I feel like depression, self-injury, and suicide is overlooked. Because, 'not that many people struggle with it'. Maybe it's because we don't know how to handle it. And maybe the people that struggle with these things, feel like no one cares, so they don't speak up about it.
   Maybe these statistics will help open your eyes, and make you realize these things are a lot more widespead than you think.

   -121 million people worldwide suffer from depression. 18 million of those are in the United States.
   -Two thirds of the people who struggle with depression, never seek treatment.
   -Every 16 minutes, someone dies from suicide.
   -One in eight teens say that they have self-injured.
   -Untreated depression is the number one cause of suicide, and suicide is the third leading cause of death among teenagers. (NIMH)
   -The World Health Organization estimates that each year, approximately one million people die from suicide.
   -Suicide is among the three leading causes of death in ages 15-44.
   -Suicide attempts are up to 20 times more frequent than completed suicides.

   I don't know about you, but the first time I read those, I found some of them shocking. A lot more facts have come out about these things lately, but a lot of us are still uninformed. And even if we are informed, some of us tend to push these issues into the corner, because talking about them would be 'awkward' or 'uncomfortable' for you. But talking about them really could save a person's life or give them hope.




   Hope. That's a word that's thrown around often, isn't it? "I hope we're having pizza for lunch!" or "Man, I REALLY hope that boy likes me!" or "I hope I get that iPod for my birthday." But, hope is bigger than that. Dictionary.com defines hope as "the feeling that what is wanted can be had or events will turn out for the best; to look forward to with desire and reasonable confidence". That is the hope people are looking for. They want to be able to feel that events will turn out for the best. They want to be able to look forward to things with confidence. A lot of times, in someone's situations, their hope is lost. Things look so dismal that they have no hope left. They don't expect hope. Chad Moses, part of the TWLOHA team, said, "Hope is not always expected, but that's what makes it so much more beautiful in the end." And Renee Yohe, so desperate for hope when she started this journey, made it a point to remind everyone that you ALWAYS have hope. She said, "The stars are always there but we miss them in the dirt and clouds. We miss them in the storms. Tell them to remember the stars. To remember hope. We have hope." No matter what, there IS hope for you. No matter what your circumstances. Renee Yohe had a horrible life, yet she had enough strength to say that no matter what, we all have hope. And you know what? She was right. Hope is always there.

   TWLOHA's catchphrase, or whatever you want to call it, is "Hope is real. Rescue is possible. Love is the movement." I couldn't have said it better. I've already covered hope. Rescue is possible. you may have to take the initiative, but it's possible. There's always a way out. And love is DEFINITELY the movement. Love changes everything. Love can make the difference between life and death. Love. It sounds so simple, doesn't it? But how many of us actually go out and try to love people around us? I know I don't always. But I know that knowing all of these things, I have to try my best. because I want to make a difference. There's someone out there who is in desperate need of love, and you could be the one to show them that love.

   If you're reading this, and you've struggled with any or all of these issues, PLEASE don't hesitate to get help. http://www.twloha.com/find-help/ This link has some good places to find help. Please, take the initiative.

   Honestly, I don't really know why I wrote this post. Maybe it's because I feel like people really aren't as informed as they should be and writing this will help inform people. Maybe it's because I want someone reading this to find hope. I don't know, but I know this is all important to me and I hope it changes something for someone.

   If you want to find out more about TWLOHA, read the full story, buy merchandise, or find help, it's all at http://www.twloha.com/ .

"We were made to be lovers bold in broken places, pouring ourselves out again and again until we're called home." -Jamie Tworkowski

Little things really can make a big difference..

So I was thinking today about how some people say little things can make a big difference. Honestly, that couldn't be more true. I mean, even a couple words can make a difference and change your whole day. or, maybe more than just your whole day."I love you." "You're beautiful." "You're amazing." those are just a few things that can really change the entire course of a person's day. Simply smiling at someone or giving them a hug, just showing a little act of kindness to someone, it can really make a difference.

I read a story once. It was about a man who killed himself. He jumped off a bridge. When the police recovered his body, they opened his wallet and found a note that said, "Today I will walk the bridge. If even one person smiles at me, I won't jump." no one smiled at him, so he jumped. I honestly don't know if this is a true story or not, and I do understand that there's no good reason to kill yourself. But because of this story, I make sure to smile at everyone. It's not a hard thing to do at all. And who knows? They could be having a REALLY bad day. Just that one smile could completely turn their day around.

There's an organization called Operation Beautiful. You might be asking what operation beautiful is. Well, anyone can participate. It's not hard. All you have to do, is write something encouraging like "You're beautiful!" on a sticky note or an index card, and place it somewhere. That's it. Not hard, is it? Nope! And it sure can change someone's day around. I participate in Operation Beautiful. I make cards that simply say, "You're beautiful!" and I post them places. I've posted them in the mall, the movie theatre, church, school.. wherever I remember to! I carry around a stack of cards in my purse, so that way, whenever I remember, I can just take one out and stick it somewhere! It truly can change someone's entire day around. Believe me, I know. Here's the link to their website, if you wanna check it out: http://operationbeautiful.com/ :) and hey, you! you're beautiful. don't forget it :)

Another little thing you can do is simply tell people you love them, they mean something to you, or just give them a hug. When one of my friends tell me that they love me or they're glad they met me or anything like that, it makes my day. It really does. It makes me smile. It doesn't take long, and it's just a few words. So take the time to say it. You never know how much you could change someone's day. If you know me, you know I'm a BIG hugger. one of the reasons why? I love getting hugs and I know they can mean a lot to someone. I know someone could be having a bad day, then someone could come and give them a hug, and their day immediately improves. So, I make sure to hug everyone. Because you really don't know how much one simple hug could mean to someone.

So take the time to do something little for someone today. It could just make a big difference :)

"Love comforteth like sunshine after rain." -William Shakespeare

...So I kinda had a blog, forgot my username, and had to make a new one..

So, because of that, I'm literally just gonna copy and paste my first entries from my old blog into this one. Thankfully I had only posted two things.. haha



I really can't believe I got myself into this.. but hey, I figured, why not? I'll blog. Can't guarantee anyone will actually read my blog, but I'll give it a shot.
Since I don't know who is actually going to take the time to read this, I guess I'll explain a little about myself. I'm 15 years old. I have four siblings and parents who love me. I'm a devoted Christian and nothing's gonna change that. My friends are extremely important to me and I try to be there for them when they need me. I love being barefoot. It's almost guaranteed that if I can be barefoot, I will be. The stars are my favourite thing in the universe. I love them, a LOT. After stars, it's the sky in general. Then it's just the rest of God's amazing creation. I personally think that God created the night and day skies the way He did just to amaze us. The way He paints and creates every single sunset and sunrise.. it never ceases to blow my mind. annnnd that's pretty much all you need to know about me for now. :)

Knowing me, I may never touch this blog again. but who knows, I might surprise myself! I might become one of those bloggers that annoys everyone because they post new things daily.. hahaha.

and last but not least, I'm gonna try to post a quote or a thought at the end of each blog entry. That is, if I remember to do so. haha. Look for it under the picture. and thanks for reading :)

"Whenever you're in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude." -William James